Looking to God in Weakness : John Kim


Psalm 73:26 (ESV)

My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

Today’s Testimony
John Kim

It's so easy for us to feel like we are not good enough or inadequate when we compare ourselves to others. The writer of Psalm 73, Asaph felt the same way as he looked at the lives of the ungodly around him. 
They seemed to be prospering and increasing in every way compared to him. But when he began to look to God for comfort and strength, he was reminded of the promised ending, a glory in eternity with God. 

I received the calling to be a pastor during the time I was applying to medical school. I had spent years studying and gaining the necessary merits that would be favorable for acceptance. But when I began the application process, I had debilitating anxiety and fear that made me question whether I really wanted to pursue the path. I had wrestled with God and questioned why I was unable to do what all of my peers seemed to be doing perfectly fine. But that's when God began to stir up in my heart a question, "Why?"

Over the next year, the same question lingered and I began to shed little by little my own visions and dreams for my life. The process continued until I had come to a point where I began to ask God, "What should I do?" Like Jesus taught us through the Lord's Prayer, I asked God: "What does He want to do with my life?" That's when He began to ignite the passion I had for the Gospel and seeing His Kingdom come. When I had finally come to surrender and accept whatever He desired to do, He began to send messengers and shown me signs that made me assured in His vision for my life.

When I had shared my calling with the people around me, many ridiculed my decision and had told me I was making a mistake. It was disheartening to hear them question what I was so confident in. But in those times God had turned my sights to Him and reminded me that my vindication comes from Him. I obeyed the calling and since then have entrusted my life in His hands. I can't say that the walk with Him was without any sorrows and suffering. However, what I have learnt is that even in those times His promise to be with me has not changed.  Every moment that I turn to Him, He has assured me of His unchanging love for me and the coming glory that awaits those who are faithful to Him.

For Your Reflection
Are you disheartened and anxious because of your surroundings? Are you feeling like you are not good enough or inadequate in comparison to others? Before you let yourself be consumed by the lies, pay attention to what God says about you. He is inviting you into His presence through the sorrows and suffering. Turn your eyes to His promise today and live in hope of the glory that awaits us.