I Am Worthy : Yeojin Seong
John 3:16 (NIV)
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
Last year, I broke up with my boyfriend after being together for about two years. It was definitely one of the hardest times of my life, but I can confidently say that it was also the time I felt closest to God.
Before the break-up, I quite didn’t understand why people had such a hard time with break-ups. In shows, movies and songs, lovers who break up drown themselves in sorrow and grief. I was confident that I was different because I was a Christian. I told myself that as long as I have Jesus, I wouldn’t need anyone else.
I was wrong. The pain was so great and unprecedented that I was unable to understand where it was coming from. I was frantic and tried to hold onto our relationship because I didn’t want this pain to continue. It felt like if I could reverse everything and return to where I was, the pain would stop. But when I saw that there was no hope in our relationship, I became desperate for help. This is when I was drawn to pray. I prayed searching for the root of my pain. I soon found out that I was mourning over the loss of my self-worth. Without realizing, I had been relying on my boyfriend to define my value and self-worth. Now that he was gone, I felt worthless.
As I continued to pray, God reminded me that my worth is not from how much others love me, but based on how much God loves me. He loves me so much that He sent His one and only Son to die such a gruesome death on the cross only so that He can be with me again.
The crazy thing is, even though I found the source of my pain and I knew that God was reaching out to help me, I was still struggling to let go of this relationship. I held on to it knowing that it was hurting me and making me feel empty. This is because I was afraid that if I let it go, I would feel even emptier. As I was wrestling with God in prayer, He repeatedly whispered in my ear that He loves me and reminded me that my worth is in Him. He urged me to have faith and let it go so that He can take control.
Little by little, I began to loosen the grip of my fingers to let go of the person who I relied on to find my self-worth for the past two years. Then I moved closer to God who consistently and patiently proclaimed His love to me. God was so patient. He was so loving. He showed me the love I know I will never be able to find from anybody else in this world. Despite my stubbornness and foolishness, He waited for me and didn’t fail to call me His own.
I know I am a precious child of God. My worth is not based on what others deem me as but based on what God has done for me. I no longer cling to my surroundings to find my worth but I hold onto something secure: God’s eternal goodness and His unfailing love. I can confidently say that I am worthy no matter what happens in my life. My worth is secured in God’s love.
For Your Reflection
What is your worth? Your worth is not based on your grades, accomplishments, credentials or status. It is not even determined by what others say about you. Your worth is only determined by God and what He was willing to give up to get you back.
Do you feel unworthy? Do you think you are not good enough? Well... Think again. Think about the price God paid to save you. He gave His one and only Son because He loves you and wants to be with you eternally. You are worthy. You are valuable.